Putting cornrows in your Bush....

I don't want to sound like a really gay terrorist or anything but I have to say that President Bush is THE WORST PRESIDENT in American History. Hey, hey, just wait a minute before you judge me! Hear me out, okay? Listen, I know what you guys are thinking "Whats up Adolf Hitler? You and Dr. Mengele want get dinner tomorrow night with Adolf Castro and Dickey Lipforest? What are you guys in the mood for? Well, I had Indian food last night but Thai sounds good..." NO NO NO! His senseless taxing of employment income, his global economic warming policies, separation of church and state, his unrelenting support for advocating nuclear powered wind farms, standardized testing of autistic children, and blatant disregard for the Bills of Government Laws PROVE that he has lied about topics, issues and ballots using knowlege of the war in Iraq (before 9/11 even happened!) and has vetoed social and national securities with his homeland regimes and it is up to us to impeach him before he is out of office!

Obviously I have thought long and hard about this and my countless hours of research have led me to an important conclusion.....alright, here goes....we make bumper stickers! I have noticed that a really powerful way to convince people who don't agree with you to take your opinion seriously is to put bumper stickers on your car! It's a great way to express yourself and you look cool doing it. I have come up with a few bumper sticker ideas that may help get this evil fascist genius out of office....

"What type of a tree is a Bush?"

"Impeaches taste good with Bush cream"

"Get the STD out of our Bush!"

"Bush is a not a good president"
"Veto the laws!"

"Who is going to be the next president?"
"My Bush is my pubic hair"

"Bushy eyebrows look good on some people but not on others"

"Don't blame me, I'm not even registered to vote!"

If anyone else comes up with other ideas for the revolution please leave a comment on my facebook page, myspace page or check out the Anti-Bush website that I am working on- Bushtotallysucksmaddicksandshit.org We are a non-profit anti-Bush organization, totally against Nazis, don't believe in homeless people, we think that genocide is super gay, homicide is sometimes cool but illegal, and hate child labor unless the children show a genuine interest in fashion. It's not too late to free your mind but the clock is ticking for an impeachment.

A new poem from Latin American poet Estaban Cuchillo!

Excerpt from his new book of poems "Dormir Entonces Pero No Esperanza"

"La ventana en la castilla esta abierto para mi amigo en la familia con lobos en la ciudad. Uno fuego cintas ve pelicula de horror. Tu comes tacos y cebollos banco se cuanto cuesto entran. Por fin necesito devolver a sudamericano en los zapatos unidos. Siempre madre con usted naranja piel, verdad? Nube pueblos contestan prohibitan suenos somos sonreer en dormido. Viento largo hombre oso cruzar la calle nosotros paz. Ninos en frente salir en las supermarcados estamos buscando por pinto malo. Luego por supuesto telephono regula ella palabras y nosotros preguntas."

Normal people scare me

I hate these annoying hipsters that hang out in front of Hot Topic in the mall. One of the guys works at Spencer's Gifts and was trying to make me feel stupid because I had a copy of Fight Club in my backpack.  He was like "I used to like Palahniuk." What a snob! I have read every Chuck Palahniuk book and I don't even like him that much any more I was just getting that book for my girlfriend because I couldn't believe that she hadn't read it. I was gonna give her the new Palahniuk but I think it might be too gross for her. It's so twisted! It's about a guy who is addicted to pretending he is elderly and he stays at nursing homes and he like eats all the old people's food and watches them go to the bathroom and stuff.  Its really weird. Anyways, I hate that guy at the mall. You know which guy I'm talking about- he is sorta short, gold teeth, wears lots of white face paint and Ugg boots, probably jewish. Whatever. I dont care what that guy thinks.

I feel like I would consider Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus more magical realism than science fiction

Did I leave my music cd in your van when we went to the beach?

Urban Self-Esteem Building Workshop

Yo Mammas so generous that she bought us delicious snacks for our Source Awards party.

Yo Mammas so helpful that she guided you through your most difficult times.

Yo Mammas so organized and efficient that she manages to successfully balance raising a family and her career.

Yo Mammas so kind hearted that she knows how to see the best qualities in everyone.

Yo Mammas so spiritually advanced that she can clearly interpret concepts of Eastern Religions into familiar terms that Western culture can understand.

It must be happy hour because you are taking cheap shots, buddy!

Computers

Have you ever had a day that you wished would never end?

I always thought of myself as sorta shy in social situations but everyone else thinks of me as really outgoing and extroverted.